Failed Excuse Letters

This is a collection of genuine excuse letters gathered through the web. These are e-mails, real excuse letters sent by parents, including original spelling and grammatical errors which was collected by schools throughout the Philippines. Read and learn from their mistakes. This is a hilarious way to learn. Brace yourselves and laugh out loud.

 

1.         “My son is under a doctors care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.”

(O bahala na ang teacher kung paano siya ie-execute. Silya elektrika o firing squad?)

 

2.         “Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.”

 (Kaya hindi dapat naglalaro ng counter-strike ang matatanda.)

 

3.         “Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.”

 (Makaimbento nga ng kalendaryong may 33 days.)

 

4.         “Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.”

(Ano daw???? I can’t get it. )

 

5.”Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced  his hip.”

 (Tulungan natin sila, Hanapin natin!)

 

6. “John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.”

(Galing! Nasa mukha niya ang gilagid.)

 

7. “Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.”

(Baka varicose veins ‘yan? Huwag kasi dapat lumalapit kahit kanino eh.)

 

8. “Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.”

 (Ayos ah, may measurement ang side.)

 

9. “Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.”

 (Aaah, eee, iii, ooo, uuu,)

 

10. “Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre)(dyrea) -(direathe) the shits.” [words in parentheses  were crossed out.]

 (LBM na nga lang eh. Mas madali pa.)

 

11.” Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.”

(Never knew na detachable na pala ang dibdib.)

 

12.” I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I dont know what size she wear.”

(Paano siya magsho-shopping kung iniwan mo siya sa bahay?)

 

13.” Sally wont be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.”

 (Mabuhay ang Patay! Long-live the dead.)

 

14. “Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.”

(Ano ba siya palahian?)

 

15. “Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.”

 (Huwag kasi magpa-party sa Malate ‘pag may pasok kinabukasan.)

 

16. “Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat,headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat,her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasnt the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.”

 (Telenovela.- Bow. Makuwento siya ha. At sa totoo lang may family history sila ng sakit.)

 

17. “Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday. “

(Panalo! Kung ganito lang kadali magrason.)

 

18. “My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.”

(Kawawa naman yung anak niya, napagdiskitahan ng Marines.)

 

19. “Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.”

(Ano ginagawa niya sa ilaim ni Dok?)

 

20. “Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.”

(Iniisip ko kung aling growing part iyon.)

 

21. “Please excuse my daughter, Cecilia Diaz, for being absent in your class because her sister got sick; her mother cannot attend to her due to the fact that the father went to Manila to call his sister who is a nurse but who was sent to a seminar in Cebu; so the father decided to call his mother but she was on vacation in Antipolo because her granddaughter joined a field trip; finally, the father came home to look for another helper but the helper eloped because her former boyfriend married another.

Thank you very much. Your kind consideration will be highly and deeply solicited.”

(Ayos ‘to, Maayos ang paliwanag.)

 

 

English is the universal language but there are things that better said in Filipino.

 

Adapted:

Carlo H. Andrion
15 Aug 2009
http://caloycoy.blogspot.com

Failed Excuse Letters

This is a collection of genuine excuse letters gathered through the web. These are e-mails, real excuse letters sent by parents, including original spelling and grammatical errors which was collected by schools throughout the Philippines. Read and learn from their mistakes. This is a hilarious way to learn. Brace yourselves and laugh out loud.

1. “My son is under a doctors care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.”

(O bahala na ang teacher kung paano siya ie-execute. Silya elektrika o firing squad?)

2. “Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.”

(Kaya hindi dapat naglalaro ng counter-strike ang matatanda.)

3. “Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.”

(Makaimbento nga ng kalendaryong may 33 days.)

Published Opinion: Media is Now a Big Business

AS I SEE IT

MEDIA IS NOW A BIG BUSINESS

Carlo H. Andrion

 
How much time do you consume spending time listening to the radio, watching television, and reading broadsheets? Does it kill your time more than your studying and perhaps your working do? Do you believe of what the media teach more than you parents had to say?

Nowadays, media (i.e.  television, radios, newspapers, tabloids, magazines, and the powerful internet) plays a big role in polishing and honing the public especially the young minds. The media offers twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week in broadcasting and airing information you should need to know and the need-not ones. They have been your favorite entertainers, teachers, and worse your bible. From cartoons for the children, educational programs for the school-ers, teen-oriented shows, reality television, fantasy shows, sci-fi, crime stories, love stories, talk shows, news, and even to those Rated-18 shows. A myriad of entertainment genre has now been available at the click of a remote. Media is everywhere. From the streets, busses and trains, schools, at home, work sphere, and even in wireless communication. All are now being controlled by the media. They keep us in touch with the international and local world. Media was being patronized and prioritized now.

In the seventy’s Philippines, the government’s media inhibition led to finally overthrow the overstaying, unconstitutional, and the overpowered government. That was not an overnight suffering and struggle for the media to broadcast the real score and status of the Philippines that time. The overpowered government took lives of the hundreds of opposing media men and had been controlling the information circulation for a long time. Though media was imbibing the consequences of having a democracy-squandered government, they are being so helpful in that scenario. Delving deeper, how did the media inhibition move the democracy-famished populace? Somehow, because media was the last resort and refuge of the savagery-stricken Filipinos that time, they were finally pissed off which led the peaceful revolution. Whatever commotion and ruckus may arise, it was a total proof how people has been fascinated with the media. They are clinging to it considering their personal beliefs associated with the media. And what is next for the Philippines? We are still clinging to the media hypes and scheme. All illogical things make happen with the power publicity.

In the U.S., the media utilizes gruesome and gory crime stories because that is the stuff that people are more likely to buy. They don’t nurture the viewers with public awareness. Portion that induces rational thinking. They don’t serve them pieces that influences and encourages people to talk or even to raise a question. Questions that may have been beneficial to the viewers seeing the rudiments of relationship between power, rank, and eminence but never had a break to ask. And surprisingly, those identical media manner has now been conquering the Philippine primetime television. I may not need to name those, but to give you a hint, switch your channel to 23. It’s the channel that accommodates imports that Pinoy shows have been succumbing for.  From dawn to midnight you are bombarded with unnumbered foreign-made viewing. And to count Pinoy-made, you can have it in your hands.

Hitherto, Philippine media is still having the compact moral standards – somehow anyhow. The Philippine Government and the Mass Media has been somehow threatened by each other. Having a shame and preempted by each other in their unconscious custom. Fear of being deprived in any sense, in any way, and reserves tacit feats. If they ram with each other, they just pause a little and then recedes. In the zenith of their juxtaposition of who influences the general public more and worse, I will presume that the media disturbs us more.

In communal setting, the media poisons the viewers’ characters somehow if the media obstruct the right thinking. It was sordidly conceptualized that some things which shall be delicately deliberated was brought into mainstream for money-making.  Innumerable bad implications of media conquering were the monopolizing of the media man’s opinion into airwaves. A mogul trying to insist personal beliefs, and opinions to the public labeling it as ‘righteous’. The media hype has now been characterized by the teenage girls’ fascination to superficiality through flirty magazines who serves as their bible and boys who are getting hooked on sexy mags, and films that heightens the breadth and width of their pervert ego. It is now converting the must-treasure conventionality of the early Filipinos into a belligerent and malicious environment. Changing and resetting the norms and creating new fads and shoddier crazes. Relevance has now been being modified, not from the righteous customs but on the eye of the blinded masses.

If I have to reckon the media with, they are powerful. They are influential, commanding, authoritative, controlling, prevailing, dominant, potent, great, mighty, formidable, weighty, mighty, muscular, brawny, sturdy, forceful, hard, violent, robust, formidable, crushing, vigorous, and sinewy. All strong adjectives that may describe them belong to them. But only one adjective prevails elsewhere in the media, they are co-existent with the civilization. They are forever – If we will assume. Thus they are continuing on creating changes, and shiftiness on the relativity of man’s nature to adapt. They give an instant attention. Turning and giving a makeover to some untalented individuals to shine and leaving nothing for the deserving. Reaping the labors form the one who shall have it.  They are merely exaggerating if not saying the right. Whatever is 'hot' they seize for it just for the sake of gaining exclusive advertising contracts and any means of profiting. Money-making is their business, and serving the viewers with the right programming is just an option.
 
Somewhere along the line, I still believe. That someday the mass media will feed me nutritious and not destructive nourishment for my insurmountable famine of curiosity. I highly commend the radical forms of media anyhow who kills the fashion that I have been describing before. Blasphemers as others may foresee, but they have my utmost entrustment. I am still getting rewarded seeing other people killing the fashion. The fashion that almost everyone are getting in to. Media is everywhere, thus their threats will tolerate in the air. Somehow, somewhere along this timeline I still want consider that there are still worthy bunch of meticulous mankind ready to scrutinize what goes and comes around. Of what to take up, swallow in, and digest through. Poison is a poison whenever they’ll put it and we will never know if it is, unless we are ceased.



***
Intellectual Property Rights Reserved:
Carlo Andrion y Hernandez
9 Aug. 2009
http://caloycoy.blogspot.com

Media Is Now a Big Business

How much time do you consume spending time listening to the radio, watching television, and reading broadsheets? Does it kill your time more than your studying and perhaps your working do? Do you believe of what the media teach more than you parents had to say?

Nowadays, media (i.e. television, radios, newspapers, tabloids, magazines, and the powerful internet) plays a big role in polishing and honing the public especially the young minds. The media offers twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week in broadcasting and airing information you should need to know and the need-not ones. They have been your favorite entertainers, teachers, and worse your bible. From cartoons for the children, educational programs for the school-ers, teen-oriented shows, reality television, fantasy shows, sci-fi, crime stories, love stories, talk shows, news, and even to those Rated-18 shows. A myriad of entertainment genre has now been available at the click of a remote. Media is everywhere. From the streets, busses and trains, schools, at home, work sphere, and even in wireless communication. All are now being controlled by the media. They keep us in touch with the international and local world. Media was being patronized and prioritized now.

Desideratum: Bagay na Dapat Gawin

Desideratum: Mga Bagay na Dapat Gawin

Sa tapat ng CSC (College Student Council) Office, nakaupo ako, mag-isa. Hawak ang cellphone, nagba-browse sa dictionary. Kailangang kumain bago sumabak sa giyera.

Ryan: “Pasok ka na nagsimula na ang screening!”

Ako: “Hindi naman ako sasali eh.” Pagsisinungaling ko.

Ryan: “Basta pasok ka na lang daw kapag sasali ka na.”

Ako: ***Di ako nakatiis. Pumasok din ako nang makaalis siya.

Pumasok ako sa CSC Office kung saan gaganapin ang screening. Sanamabits Ang lamig. Parang di yata ako makakapag-isip ng maayos. Then the journey continuous. (Nagsimula ng tumugtog ang Super Mario Theme)

Sa Paglipad ng Maya

Biyernes, ala-syete ng umaga, nagising ako sa dahil sa alarm at sa mga huni ng maya na kumakatok sa bintanang salamin ng aking kwarto. Masakit ang buong katawan, ikaw ba naman ang matulog ng alas-kwatro ng umaga dahil lamang sa pesteng plano ng bahay na yan. Agad akong bumangon. Noon ko na naman naisip na kahit patay katawan ka, kaya mong bumangon basta bukas ang isip mo sa responsibilidad na haharapin mo. Lumabas ako sa asotea, (terrace). Dinama ang sinag ng makulimlim na umaga. Tumingala, iniunat ang braso at binuksan ang mga palad. Iniisip kong yakap ko ang Diyos at sabay nagpasalamat dahil sa panibagong simula sa piling ng mahal kong pamilya.

Ayos! Nakuha ko na ang momentum para simulan ang bagong pahina ng buhay. Naligo, kumain, dumating sa pamantasan bago mag-ikawalo. “Ayos! Maipapasa ko na rin.” Iyan ang naisambit ko dahil umabot sa due date ang bunga ng sakripisyo. Bonus na kapag pinuri pa ito.

SONA 2009: This Made Me Smile

I have been fascinated by the Presidents' courage and superb intelligence. I never admired her like this until I had her SONA last July 27th. And I never imagined those conceited and deluded critics of her that way before. Revealing their selfish goals and political ambitions. I must say that she has been a good president. If not as the bestest. She stood modest and noble. I can't find any other words to describe and appreciate much how much she done in strengthening the country's economy. Bravo for her and long-live Philippines.

Here are her quotable quotes. You can use this as a reference.

"I had not done any of the things that scared my worst critics. “They are frightened by their own shadows.”

" A few days ago Moody’s upgraded our credit rating, citing the resilience of our
economy. The state of our nation is a strong economy
Good news for our people, bad news for our critics"

" I did not become President to be popular. To work, to lead, to protect and
preserve our country, our people, that is why I became President"

" Some say that after this SONA, it will be all politics. Sorry, but there’s more
work"

" I supported the tough version of the House of the Cheaper Medicine
Law, I supported it over the weak version of my critics.
To those who want to be President, this advice: If you really want something
done, just do it. Do it hard, do it well. Don’t pussyfoot. Don't pander. And
don’t say bad words in public."

" At the end of this speech I shall step down from this stage, but not from the
Presidency. My term does not end until next year. Until
then, I will fight for the ordinary Filipino. The nation comes first. There is
much to do as head of state to the very last day"

" As I said earlier, so
far we have been spared its worst effects but we cannot be complacent. We
only know that we have generated more resources on which to draw, and
thereby created options we could take. Thank God we did not let our critics
stop us."

" As the campaign unfolds and the candidates take to the airwaves, I ask them
to talk more about how they will build up the nation rather than tear down
their opponents. (applause) Give the electorate real choices and not just sweet
talk. (applause) Meanwhile, I will keep a steady hand on the tiller, keeping the
ship of state away from the shallows some prefer, and steering it straight on
the course we set in 2001"

" However much a President wishes it, a national problem cannot be knocked
out with a single punch. A President must work with the problem as much as
against it, turn it into a solution if she can"

" There isn’t a day I do not work at my job or a waking moment when I do not
think through a work-related problem. Even my critics cannot begrudge the
long hours I put in. Our people deserve a government that works just as hard
as they do"

" Everything right can be undone by even a single wrong. Every step forward
must be taken in the teeth of political pressures and economic constraints
that could push you two steps back if you flinch and falter. I have not
flinched, I have not faltered. Hindi ako umaatras sa hamon. And I
have never done any of the things that scared my worst critics so much. They
are frightened by their own shadows"

" In the face of attempted coups, I issued emergency proclamations just in case.
But I was able to resolve these military crises with the ordinary powers of my
office. My critics call it dictatorship. I call it determination"

" But I never declared martial law, (applause) though they are running scared
as if I did. In truth, what they are really afraid of is their weakness in the face
of this self-imagined threat"

" I say to them: Do not tell us what we all know, that democracy can be
threatened. Tell us what you will do when it is attacked"

" I know what to do: As I have shown, I will defend democracy with arms when
it is threatened by violence; with firmness when it is weakened by division;
with law and order when it is subverted by anarchy; and always, I will try to
sustain it by wise policies of economic progress, so that a democracy means
not just an empty liberty but a full life for all"

" I have never expressed the desire to extend myself beyond my term.
Many of those who accuse me of it tried to cling like nails to their posts"

" I am accused of misgovernance. Many of those who accuse me of it left me the
problem of their misgovernance to solve. And we did it"

" I am falsely accused, without proof, of using my position for personal profit.
Many who accuse me of it have lifestyles and spending habits that make them
walking proofs of that crime"

" We can read their frustrations. They had the chance to serve this good
country and they blew it by serving themselves"

" Those who live in glass houses should cast no stones. Those who should be in
jail should not threaten it, especially if they have been there"

" Today the Philippines is weathering well the storm that is raging around the
world. It is growing stronger with the challenge. When the weather clears, as it
will, there is no telling how much farther forward it can go. Believe in it. I
believe"

*Thanks to http://adonisjorda.multiply.com for sharing these facts.