7/15/2011

Ampatuan, and Anne Curtis

Warning: Fiction unless backed up with links.


OMG! Eeeeeh!




Name Change


Zaldy Ampatuan Jr., one of the principal accused  to the gruesome murders in 2009 that brought the country high in the impunity index cuts ties with  his father Andal Sr. and brother Andal Jr.  by signing an affidavit attesting to his father's and brother's roles in the massacre. 


“Willing po ako mag-testify, sabihin kahit sino man ang involved, magulang ko man o kapatid, at kahit sino man involved para sa ikakalutas ng problemang ito at pawang katotohanan lamang ang aking sasabihin. (I’m willing to testify and speak the truth, even if my testimony will involve my father and brother),” he said in an interview.


However, Justice Secretary De Lima has dismissed the possibility of considering Zaldy Jr. as a state witness (from being one of the accused.) Citing De Lima's point, if it would have been, the statement of the witnesses will only contradict it. "We don't need him." says De Lima.



Since the request has been denied informally, Zaldy Jr. decides, because of great shame, no longer want to use the most-dreaded surname of the 2009. 


We conducted a poll of what surname should Zaldy Jr. and his family use once the fantasy-request has been granted. Here are the results:


A. Zaldy Arroyo - since they're very close friends.


We'll devour them! Rawr!


B. Zaldy Bieber - as he's singing to De Lima  "..I know you want me.." as a state witness.

C. Zaldy Gonzales - for giving him the hope to be a state witness. Raul Gonzalez is my bestfriend!

D. Zaldy Aquino - after endorsing PNoy for 2010 Prexy Elections.

E. Zaldy __________ - comment in for your suggestion.



The Gang-raped Preggy


After rumors have spread all over the wires citing a gang-rape committed by the four members Philippine Azkals, here's a real story of a gang-rape overseas somewhere in Dammam, Saudi Arabia.


The ill-fated Filipina who works as a school cleaner in a university was 'bangbus-ed' (raped) by 3 Arab men inside the service bus of the university where she's working. She was offered a ride after attending to her check-up. The 34-year-old woman, who is 9-months pregnant has only been working for about a year, while his husband was in Ha-il who works as a waiter. The husband was very very furious when informed of his wife’s plight. He even said very very bad words in the streets



Back to the Pipland (Philippines)


Princess of All Media, Actress, Host, Product Endorser, and soon to be Recording Artist Anne Curtis Smith (as she describes herself)  releases her first solo album (Wow. She sings? How true?) entitled "Anne-Bisyosa" in today's episode of KrisTV after discovering the wonders of autotune.


Anne rode in MRT to get to Kylie Minogue concert. (Who's Kylie Minogue btw?)

Released under VIVA Records, the album was set to destroy the meaning of 'singing'. The album features three duets with Pop Princess Sarah Geronimo with the songs "Total Eclipse of the Heart", "Alone" and "Too Many Walls". Anne also has a duet with rapper Andrew E. in the said album. 


However, some groups are seeking a class suit against parties, and people who encouraged Anne to do the album. 


Ogie Alcasid, president of the Organisasyon ng Pilipinong Mang-aawit (OPM) was urged by many budding Pinoy singing artists to set qualifications, and control measures to those celebrities who want to cross the threshold of 'singing' from merely lip-syncing: Vice Ganda, Marian Rivera, Manny Pacquiao, Willie Revillame, among others.


Poll Question:


Ano ang masasabi mo sa "Anne-Bisyosa" album ni Anne Curtis?


A. The title speaks for itself.

B. Pwede na! Iisipin ko na lang hindi si Anna 'yan!

C. Maganda talaga si Anne. Period!

D. Wow kumakanta na si Anne? Kaya ko naman din siguro.

E. Pakialam mo ba? E kung siya nga ang may pera't fans. Inggit lang kayo!



6 comments:

  1. Zaldy bin Andal al-Saddam (Zaldy Saddam)

    A

    ReplyDelete
  2. Celebs release cds because their fans are dumb. No two ways about it.

    ReplyDelete
  3. o kaya Zaldy bin Andal al-Saddambinladin
    (Zaldy Saddambinladen)

    ReplyDelete

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