Ampatuan, and Anne Curtis

Warning: Fiction unless backed up with links.

OMG! Eeeeeh!

Name Change

Zaldy Ampatuan Jr., one of the principal accused  to the gruesome murders in 2009 that brought the country high in the impunity index cuts ties with  his father Andal Sr. and brother Andal Jr.  by signing an affidavit attesting to his father's and brother's roles in the massacre. 

“Willing po ako mag-testify, sabihin kahit sino man ang involved, magulang ko man o kapatid, at kahit sino man involved para sa ikakalutas ng problemang ito at pawang katotohanan lamang ang aking sasabihin. (I’m willing to testify and speak the truth, even if my testimony will involve my father and brother),” he said in an interview.

However, Justice Secretary De Lima has dismissed the possibility of considering Zaldy Jr. as a state witness (from being one of the accused.) Citing De Lima's point, if it would have been, the statement of the witnesses will only contradict it. "We don't need him." says De Lima.

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Since the request has been denied informally, Zaldy Jr. decides, because of great shame, no longer want to use the most-dreaded surname of the 2009. 

We conducted a poll of what surname should Zaldy Jr. and his family use once the fantasy-request has been granted. Here are the results:

A. Zaldy Arroyo - since they're very close friends.

We'll devour them! Rawr!

B. Zaldy Bieber - as he's singing to De Lima  "..I know you want me.." as a state witness.

C. Zaldy Gonzales - for giving him the hope to be a state witness. Raul Gonzalez is my bestfriend!

D. Zaldy Aquino - after endorsing PNoy for 2010 Prexy Elections.

E. Zaldy __________ - comment in for your suggestion.

The Gang-raped Preggy

After rumors have spread all over the wires citing a gang-rape committed by the four members Philippine Azkals, here's a real story of a gang-rape overseas somewhere in Dammam, Saudi Arabia.

The ill-fated Filipina who works as a school cleaner in a university was 'bangbus-ed' (raped) by 3 Arab men inside the service bus of the university where she's working. She was offered a ride after attending to her check-up. The 34-year-old woman, who is 9-months pregnant has only been working for about a year, while his husband was in Ha-il who works as a waiter. The husband was very very furious when informed of his wife’s plight. He even said very very bad words in the streets. 

Back to the Pipland (Philippines)

Princess of All Media, Actress, Host, Product Endorser, and soon to be Recording Artist Anne Curtis Smith (as she describes herself)  releases her first solo album (Wow. She sings? How true?) entitled "Anne-Bisyosa" in today's episode of KrisTV after discovering the wonders of autotune.

Anne rode in MRT to get to Kylie Minogue concert. (Who's Kylie Minogue btw?)

Released under VIVA Records, the album was set to destroy the meaning of 'singing'. The album features three duets with Pop Princess Sarah Geronimo with the songs "Total Eclipse of the Heart", "Alone" and "Too Many Walls". Anne also has a duet with rapper Andrew E. in the said album. 

However, some groups are seeking a class suit against parties, and people who encouraged Anne to do the album. 

Ogie Alcasid, president of the Organisasyon ng Pilipinong Mang-aawit (OPM) was urged by many budding Pinoy singing artists to set qualifications, and control measures to those celebrities who want to cross the threshold of 'singing' from merely lip-syncing: Vice Ganda, Marian Rivera, Manny Pacquiao, Willie Revillame, among others.

Poll Question:

Ano ang masasabi mo sa "Anne-Bisyosa" album ni Anne Curtis?

A. The title speaks for itself.

B. Pwede na! Iisipin ko na lang hindi si Anna 'yan!

C. Maganda talaga si Anne. Period!

D. Wow kumakanta na si Anne? Kaya ko naman din siguro.

E. Pakialam mo ba? E kung siya nga ang may pera't fans. Inggit lang kayo!

Ampatuan, and Anne Curtis

Warning: Fiction unless backed up with links.

OMG! Eeeeeh!

Name Change

Zaldy Ampatuan Jr., one of the principal accused  to the gruesome murders in 2009 that brought the country high in the impunity index cuts ties with  his father Andal Sr. and brother Andal Jr.  by signing an affidavit attesting to his father's and brother's roles in the massacre. 

“Willing po ako mag-testify, sabihin kahit sino man ang involved, magulang ko man o kapatid, at kahit sino man involved para sa ikakalutas ng problemang ito at pawang katotohanan lamang ang aking sasabihin. (I’m willing to testify and speak the truth, even if my testimony will involve my father and brother),” he said in an interview.

However, Justice Secretary De Lima has dismissed the possibility of considering Zaldy Jr. as a state witness (from being one of the accused.) Citing De Lima's point, if it would have been, the statement of the witnesses will only contradict it. "We don't need him." says De Lima.

When the Eggs Get Caught

Warning: Fiction unless backed up with links.

Courtesy Benchtm.com

"Napuna ko lang na yung billboard na malalaki, na sa tingin ko na hindi angkop sa mga bata."said Valenzuela City Mayor Gatchalian to the members of the media last July 8.

Mayor Gatchalian is heeding for the immediate dismantling of the huge billboard of the members of Philippine Volcanoes Rugby Team. Of which he finds a 'kakampi' in the person of Mayor Benhur Abalos of Mandaluyong where the 'bird-boards' were located.  

Andre Woolf a member of the Volcanoes, regarded this act as 'politicizing'.

"Philippine Volcanoes are endorsing Bench and promoting a team na lumalaban para sa ating bansa, hindi lang billboards promoting ourselves to political popularity." (Wolff via BBM)

Mayor Gatchalian defended, "Kung sa ibang tao tingin nila ito ay artistic, ito ay maganda, pero sa ibang tao ito ay offensive at ito ay hindi maayos, lalong-lalo na sa ating mga kabataan."

"Nagkataon lang na yun lang ang pinakamalalaki na billboard. Iyon lang ang napuna ko." Now, Mayor Gatchalian is convinced that it is BIG.

Another member, Ned Stephenson, said he saw nothing wrong with the ad campaign.

To be fair, there are other 'lewd' billboards in the metro.

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Like this:

"The Mayor of Mandaluyong is having the #Bench #Volcanoes billboards removed.Dati ba wala bang nakalagay na billboard na my nakabrief?," tweeted Andrew Wolff.

Does that mean we could remove also Mayor Abalos' posters in Mandaluyong? It seemed like every corner of the street is occupied with same face.

 Happy to 'catch' the birds.

Now, the empty billboards.

Two men, tweeting contentedly.

RB: MMDA Chairman says male underwear ad violated size restrictions. He meant the billboard size, of course. By that way, that was a brief statement from the chairman. :-)

SG: wild ka ruffy! Tawa ako ng tawa sa tweet mo!

RB: Oh, you're getting the hang of it.... :-) RT @wahlnarchy: @rb or he could go on and say that the models were too cocky.

SG: I love your "brief" jokes... Wala na ba?

RB: No, it's not true that this male underwear billboard issue is just about some people jockeying for attention. It was a legitimate concern.

SG: thanks bro! Sobra naman talaga you "men in briefs" billboard! The billboard was 4 stories high! #MIB

Are they frustrated underwear models? 

SG

RB

 

That's how the birds were caught.

Valenzuela Mayor Sherwin Gatchalian is the former boyfriend of actress, Pauleen Luna. Relevance to the post? Lol

To be doubted: 91% of men in Metro Manila do not have that 'fit' body. It's depressing to see if you're a man, and more depressing if you're a married woman because your man is not that 'hunky'. K.

When the Eggs Get Caught

Warning: Fiction unless backed up with links.

Courtesy Benchtm.com

"Napuna ko lang na yung billboard na malalaki, na sa tingin ko na hindi angkop sa mga bata."said Valenzuela City Mayor Gatchalian to the members of the media last July 8.

Mayor Gatchalian is heeding for the immediate dismantling of the huge billboard of the members of Philippine Volcanoes Rugby Team. Of which he finds a 'kakampi' in the person of Mayor Benhur Abalos of Mandaluyong where the 'bird-boards' were located.  

Andre Woolf a member of the Volcanoes, regarded this act as 'politicizing'.

"Philippine Volcanoes are endorsing Bench and promoting a team na lumalaban para sa ating bansa, hindi lang billboards promoting ourselves to political popularity." (Wolff via BBM)

Mayor Gatchalian defended, "Kung sa ibang tao tingin nila ito ay artistic, ito ay maganda, pero sa ibang tao ito ay offensive at ito ay hindi maayos, lalong-lalo na sa ating mga kabataan."

"Nagkataon lang na yun lang ang pinakamalalaki na billboard. Iyon lang ang napuna ko." Now, Mayor Gatchalian is convinced that it is BIG.

Another member, Ned Stephenson, said he saw nothing wrong with the ad campaign.

To be fair, there are other 'lewd' billboards in the metro.

War, and Peace, and Car

Warning: Fiction, unless backed up with links.

With the recurring blast of the PCSO anomalies, some netizens stated that this could trigger the battle between the government and the church. Not the war that someone need a shell and certainly not the war that where one needs an ancient warship! 

BRP Rajah Humabon (PF-11)

Despite the controversies, Malacanang insisted that they (gossipmongers) should stick with the issue, not with the personalities. Sure thing. (Trying to pretend that they're objective enough.) 

Bishop Bastes of Sorsogon cleared that 'everything was incidental' and that having a gift (SUV is more than a gift) from PCSO is just a result of auditing. One of the anomalies that PCSO is committing. (Trying hard to escape eh?)

What the Palace has to say? "Let's stick with the issues." (Valte) Sounds cliche. K.

However, Bishop Bastes commented on the manner of ongoing Senate investigation as it zeroing in the poor bishops who, according to him, do it for the love of their people. (Bravo!)

"There are many corrupt things in PCSO do not involve 'bishops'." (Yes father.) The incident was just a 'little' thing over many things. (As the sophism proceeds.)

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Should we be “thankful" to the bishops because they are doing things the government failed to do?

Tondo Feeding Center and Remote Area in Metro Manila

Overseas, peace is now temporarily attained in South Sudan. Yuba is now the capital of the new-birth nation. Now it's people is living at ease (at least), until the US government will come to realize that there's much greater deposits of oil there. 

Back to Pipland, critics were shocked when they heard that PNoy sold his car, Porshe 911. This ultra-mega fast car is worth 4.5 Million. 

Now that PNoy is no-faster, that could mean he's not rushing with his lovelife anymore?

I couldn't tell either.

President Noy is an anagram of Nerdiest Pony.

War, and Peace, and Car

Warning: Fiction, unless backed up with links.

With the recurring blast of the PCSO anomalies, some netizens stated that this could trigger the battle between the government and the church. Not the war that someone need a shell and certainly not the war that where one needs an ancient warship! 

BRP Rajah Humabon (PF-11)

Despite the controversies, Malacanang insisted that they (gossipmongers) should stick with the issue, not with the personalities. Sure thing. (Trying to pretend that they're objective enough.) 

Bishop Bastes of Sorsogon cleared that 'everything was incidental' and that having a gift (SUV is more than a gift) from PCSO is just a result of auditing. One of the anomalies that PCSO is committing. (Trying hard to escape eh?)

What the Palace has to say? "Let's stick with the issues." (Valte) Sounds cliche. K.

However, Bishop Bastes commented on the manner of ongoing Senate investigation as it zeroing in the poor bishops who, according to him, do it for the love of their people. (Bravo!)

"There are many corrupt things in PCSO do not involve 'bishops'." (Yes father.) The incident was just a 'little' thing over many things. (As the sophism proceeds.)